Newspaper Boys & Girls, Intl: All-Animal News Special

posted by Newspaper Boys @ 13:55 PM
March 30, 2012

 Ooookay, we ‘younger-than-teen’ newspaper delivery kids said we would go on strike.  No news door to door,  if Ms. Doc Jael don’t let us say somethin’ ‘bout the animals.  Cause if we don’t work, the public don’t get the news.  So she gave in, but now we must do a week of what they call ‘patience submission training.’ Oeyvey!  What we kids must do for the animals, cause you adults sure don’t.
 Janet:  Yes, how come it took all these years for you smart grown people to figure out that ‘clothianidin’ pesticide spray is killing the bees?  Environmental News Service (ENS) says that last week “more than a million citizens signed an emergency legal petition” with the EPA to please stop spray killing our bees.

 This stuff has been killing bees since 2003.  And Jael’s been writing for years about it.  Don’t you know that without bees, we won’t have food?  Are ya’ll grown ups idiots or what?  Well, need I ask that?

 David:  Did ya’ll know that these big grocery stores sell whale meat?  Janet is right! Some o’ this stuff, the gang’s here been writing ‘bout for years.  Why encourage those bullies with big gun boats to kill whales by selling whale meat?  This news outlet’s been yellin’ about whale murder forrreeverrr!

 So recently ENS says “tens of thousands of people took action via Twitter, Facebook and HSI’s petition” to tell Jeff Bezos, head of to stop selling whale meat.  So he took “145 food products” with whale meat off the site!  Way to go people! Way to go!

 Janet:  En David, did you hear that law makers in New York are trying to stop the sell of shark fins there?  Bout time.  And it should spread across the nation.

 Howie:  Well this one’s a Zowie.  Those huge windmills they’re building for a new kind of energy may be killing eagles and bats.  UPI and say that windmills and the birds depend on the same air currents.  Its a big problem for these animals cause the wind power people want the right to “harm” the birds.

 Annie:  Our newspaper boys and girls in Britain tweeted that thousands of lambs are dying in England and Europe and scientists don’t know why.  Baby lambs are either born dead or come with such crocked bodies that they cannot live.
 David:  We’s got to follow up on that one Annie. It’s like in Tennessee horses and cattle are dying mysteriously and the docs can’t figure out why.

 Older Teen:  That’s enough ‘bout animals you guys.  Ya’ll complained your way into havin’ your say.  But you got to get to Dr. Repriestly’s ‘patience and submission’ class NOW.  We all got to learn to submit to God’s order of authority.

 Your wholesale Christian kids t-shirts from Colossians 1: 11 say believers are strengthened by “patience and longsuffering with joyfulness.”  All you guys do is complain about the animals.  And complaining all the time ain’t being joyful.

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